Pod kůží Under the Skin

VII.

We entered the apartment.

The first thing I felt was warmth.

Then a smell.

Tea.

Laundry detergent.

Something fried that had long since gone cold.

Filip threw his keys onto the dresser.

He missed.

They slid under the shoe cabinet.

“Great.”

Kuba just walked past them.

“Leave them there.”

“I’ll be looking for them again in the morning.”

“Then hit the target next time.”

Matěj chuckled.

“You can’t expect much from him.”

Adam walked past me.

He was almost in the living room when he noticed I had stopped.

He turned.

“Elias?”

I looked up.

“Are you coming?”

He said it calmly.

Not as an invitation.

More like a question he hadn’t even thought about.

I nodded.

I slowly took off my shoes.

I set them down neatly together.

I looked at the others.

One was lying upside down.

The other was half under the coat rack.

No one cared.

The living room was smaller than I expected. There was a sofa bed by the window, a TV opposite that was running quietly without sound, and between them a low table full of mugs, remotes, and a few textbooks. A T-shirt was draped over the radiator, a hoodie hung on the back of a chair, and a backpack lay under the table, untouched.

It wasn’t a mess.

More like a place where someone actually lived.

I sat at the edge of the sofa.

Filip opened the fridge.

“Who ate my yogurt again?”

“It wasn’t yours.”

“It was!”

“It wasn’t.”

“It was!”

“I’ll buy you two.”

“It’s not about the yogurt.”

“Then what is it?”

Filip paused for a moment.

“...probably the principle.”

Matěj started laughing so loudly he had to lean on the counter.

Adam just shook his head.

“Same old.”

He poured water into the kettle.

He turned it on.

No one argued.

In a moment they were talking about something completely different.

I watched them.

Meanwhile Filip pulled four mugs from the shelf.

He searched a little longer for the fifth.

“Where did the blue one disappear to this time?”

“You broke it.”

“I didn’t.”

“You did.”

“I didn’t.”

“You did.”

Adam opened the cupboard above the sink.

Without a word he took out another one.

He placed it on the counter.

Filip just shrugged.

“Never mind.”

The kettle clicked. The water finished boiling. Soon we were all holding mugs. Adam handed me one. “Careful, it’s hot.”

I took it with both hands.

It was warm.

Almost burning.

Still, I didn’t let go.

We sat for a long time.

The conversation drifted from one topic to another. They talked about school for a while, then about some series that Adam kept refusing to watch, and eventually they ended up back on games. They spoke over each other, interrupted each other occasionally, but no one got angry. When someone disagreed, seconds later they were laughing about something else.

I listened.

Sometimes I caught myself smiling.

Each time I quickly hid the smile again.

The mugs slowly emptied.

Filip stretched.

“I can’t anymore.”

“You’ve been saying that for an hour.”

“This time I mean it.”

Matěj got up from the table.

He gathered two mugs.

Filip took another.

No one made a big deal of it.

Everyone just did something.

Meanwhile Adam opened the living room cupboard.

He searched inside for a moment.

He took out a pillow.

Then a blanket.

He laid them on the sofa.

“You’ll sleep here.”

I nodded.

“Thanks.”

He nodded shortly.

As if it were the most natural thing in the world.

Filip turned on his way to the room.

“The bathroom is on the left.”

“And hot water takes a while,” Kuba added.

“Yeah... and don’t let the fan scare you.”

“It sounds like a plane taking off.”

Matěj laughed.

“But it hasn’t fallen yet.”

I went inside.

A small mirror.

A sink.

A razor on the shelf.

Toothpaste.

And next to it a new toothbrush.

Still wrapped.

I stared at it for a moment.

Adam’s voice came from behind me.

“It’s new.”

I turned around.

He just walked past me.

He turned off the hallway light.

“Good night.”

I went back into the living room.

The only light in the room was a small lamp by the TV, and soft light was coming from the hallway. Laughter came from one room, a bed creaked in the other, and then someone mumbled something I couldn’t understand.

The apartment was slowly falling asleep.

I slowly sat on the edge of the sofa.

I ran my hand over the blanket.

It was soft.

For a while I just sat.

I wasn’t in a hurry.

No one was sending me anywhere.

No one was asking why I wasn’t sleeping yet.

I just listened.

To water running somewhere.

To someone closing a door.

To someone quietly wishing good night.

I stretched out.

The blanket smelled of laundry detergent.

I didn’t know that scent.

Still, it felt strangely calm.

A quiet conversation kept going for a while from the room next door. I couldn’t understand the words, only the voices. After a few minutes those voices quieted too.

Only the steady sound of the radiator remained.

And the silence.

I woke up.

For a moment I didn’t know where I was.

Then I smelled laundry detergent.

And I remembered.

I sat up.

For a moment I just sat.

Then I stood up.

I folded the blanket carefully.

I folded it in half.

Then once more.

I smoothed the edges.

“You don’t have to.”

I startled.

I turned around.

Matěj was standing in the bathroom doorway.

His hair was messy.

He held a towel in one hand.

He looked at the folded blanket.

Then at me.

“We’ll just throw it out again tonight.”

He shrugged.

He left for the kitchen.

I stayed standing.

I looked at the blanket.

I gave up on making it any neater.

I walked to the door.

I slowly pressed the handle.

“Elias.”

I looked back.

Matěj was leaning against the kitchen frame.

He was already holding a mug.

“Take care.”

I nodded.

I walked out into the hallway.